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The bottom line is – if he’s still going to the same places he went to meet women before he met you, it’s a red flag.Ī player talks one way, and acts another.Ī man (or anyone) can talk a certain way, and then act another way.
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Habits such as going to clubs multiple times a week with all of his single friends, or whatever the case might be depending on his personality. Groups of friends join together, new connections are formed, and experiences are enhanced.īut, certain habits do stop. When two people come together, they should enhance each others’ lives. No, I am not saying that a man should squander his social life when he starts dating someone. Sure, he might be busy with work, but this is 2014, people are constantly attached to their phones and he will find time to text you back if he really wants to.Ī player still goes to the same places he was going before he met you. Is he talkative, romantic and friendly as the weekend is approaching or when he’s asking you to spend time together, but seems distant and much less eager to respond to texts any other time? Unless he’s trying to see you, a player never talks to you.
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If you feel like the man you’re talking to could just insert any other woman’s name into the things he says to you and your topics of conversation, you’re probably being played. Small things like asking how your grandmother’s cold is, or not your first date – but the date you met. That being said, though, if we are with a woman we truly care about, we will put in the energy and effort to keep track of things. It’s not that we don’t listen, it’s just that sometimes we genuinely can’t remember smaller details about things. Some guys, myself included, have less-than-perfect memories. You deserve better than being a backup plan.Ī player gets upset if you won’t spend the night.ĭon’t get me wrong – no single man will turn down physical advances from a woman he is attracted to, but if he is truly interested in building a relationship, that certainly won’t be his only focus.Ī player remembers nothing about your conversations. Not only might he always be “too busy” or delay getting together (probably because he’s with another woman), but if his only invitation to you is a Friday night text asking if you want to get a drink, he may have had plans fall through and isn’t showing you the proper amount of effort to actually plan a night around you and your interests. This is to say, his attempts to spend time with you are weak, at best. To them, the dating “game” is just that – a game they can play in order to win…that’s why they’re called players.Ī man who is truly interested in you will take the time to converse with you and relate to you during your discussions, not keep all of the attention on himself to convince you how great he is.
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If every conversation is about physicality, you know where his attention is focused.Ī player spends more time talking about himself than trying to get to know you.Ī player is usually insecure and tries to show himself they can get the girl – so learning about you is secondary. When looking to build a relationship with someone, it goes without saying that their valuing your substance and you as a person is essential to making it work. This overused ‘compliment’ not only undermines your personality by suggesting the only reason you’d be with someone is because of your looks – but it also shows you that’s what he’s clearly focusing on. If a man is vague in his discussion and doesn’t dive into what makes you tick, what your passions are, and what you want out of life, you have to honestly ask yourself how interested he truly is.Ī player tells you things like you’re “too beautiful/hot/sexy/smoldering/intoxicating/etc.” to be single. In other words, could his compliments be copy and pasted into his texts to another girl, or is he talking about something specific to you? Unfortunately, in today’s society, there needs to be a conversation about commitment had before it can be assumed that either partner is actually committed and not talking to anyone else. Do some women do this too? Sure, but in a more “traditional” sense, men are more notorious for saying all the right things they don’t really mean in order to get what they want – so that’s who we’ll focus on here.Ī player makes generalized statements in your direction rather than talking about you. Too many women get used and hurt by men who are playing with their feelings in order to get what they want, but in reality actually have no intention of commitment or building a relationship together. Unfortunately, I’ve seen a lot of hurt and disappointment that could’ve been avoided, had warning signs been recognized. I’ve been floating around to different blogs tagged with ‘dating’ and ‘relationships’ to see what’s going on in the world.